WOW. What. A. WEEKEND. This will end up being my second to last blog that I write this year and boy it comes with some fun recaps of maybe the best matchups we’ve had all year. Only two matchups left this year… Let’s dive into it.
DOWN GOES DESHAUN
Oh boy… I have been foaming at the mouth to recap this game. This was MY Super Bowl. David vs. Goliath. Foles vs. Brady. Biden vs. Trump. Ukraine vs. Russia. Free Deshaun vs. The Spicy Boys. These are some of the greatest ‘odds are against us’ moments in World History. In one of the most incredible upsets, The Spicy Boys fucking did it. No one believed in them. But I did. I was going to try and track the matchup timeslot by timeslot, but I was only able to remember after the 1pm games Saturday. However, that still provides a pretty incredible glimpse into where the projections sat at that moment. At 4:06pm, only 54 minutes before the typical Christmas Eve mass started throughout the East Coast, The Spicy Boys were projected to lose by 40 points with both teams having 6 more players to play. Over the next 31 hours, a miracle befitting for Christmas Day would occur. People talk about Jesus turning water into wine (as I write this, I totally forgot that Derek already made this joke but it’s still funny) but what about John & Derek turning a team of misfit toys into a finalist? I would argue Santa couldn’t even pull off what these men did and that guy flies around the entire world in one night. IMPRESSIVE stuff. Free Deshaun’s luck had finally run out. Even if they set the perfect lineup, they were simply not going to be able to have a storybook ending to their season as it appears The Spicy Boys were the authors the whole time. Heading into Sunday night, as holiday cheer was being spread and drinks were flowing, The Boys rolled out 45-year-old Tom Brady and BOTH RBs for the Tampa Bay Bucs. FD only had Chris Godwin to matchup against the trio. Free Deshaun had 37-point lead heading into the game. Now when I looked at it on paper, the double RB start seemed like an insane move and one that would end up costing them. However, Lenny & Rachaad rumbled their way to a combined 47 points and helped pull off one of the greatest upsets in the history of fantasy football. All year, Free Deshaun comfortably handled their business, but it seems like once Deshaun was actually free, the team no longer was. Rest in peace to what was the most dominant regular season turned all-time choke job. You will not be missed.
Violet’s Violent Streak Continues
TVB, for the second week in a row, knocked off a familiar foe. The Funkles, like those who have come before them, were one of the stronger teams all season but fell victim to a team getting hot at the right time. The week started out strong for them after Joey B put on a show in the first half but as his game faltered later on, so did the Funkles. Two key guys in Swift & Diggs combining for 9.10 points is not going to get it done in the playoffs and the odd start of Mack Hollins (lmao) did not make it any better. TVB even benched a guy for Monday night (a sign of disrespect and a little bit of gamesmanship). Both QBs had great games (former Batgirls) but Pat’s favorite QB Dak is the one who ended up winning this one for TVB. Inside sources say that Pat was actively rooting for the Cowboys to win the game in an act of pure selfishness. It’s been a tough few weeks for the McKinstry family as Pat has managed to dismantle both of the brothers in upset form. We now see the 5 seed walk through to the championship and I’m not sure many people saw that one coming.
Property Taxes Will Be High With All Those Akers
Cam Akers. What a guy. You may recall earlier in the year I was calling for this man’s head. Truthfully, I thought he didn’t deserve to be on my roster for the first 13 weeks of the season. He was a high draft choice, someone I hoped would fill the hole left by Javonte and I truly believed in him coming into this season. Well folks, he has finally arrived, and he did it when The Batgirls needed him most, the showing of a true champion. All the oddsmakers had this one as a blowout. People doubted the Batgirls, especially after being stunned by the TCs last week. However, after a week of some tough practices and a visit from Gary Vee & Andrew Tate, the girls fucking showed up. Even with a poor performance from Starboy Justin Fields, the Batgirls put an absolute beating down on CTB. CTB’s nightmare season ends with them getting the #3 pick and thinking about where it all went wrong.
Semi-Final Picks: 1-2
Picks to Date: 39-31
Confirmed Draft Spots:
#3 – Choking the Belichicken
#4 – Portuguese Short Kings
#5 – Sad Dads
#6 – Nine Inch Males
#7 – The Funky Uncles
#8 – Free Deshaun
Championship Preview
#5 vs. #6. It’s exactly how we all envisioned it. A team that firesold a majority of their key pieces before the playoffs vs. a team who just barely made it. It’s a storybook ending and a proper one for the Super League’s inaugural season. These two have only met once this whole season back in Week 8 when TVB snagged a close victory 176.41 to 175.02. They were amongst the worst playoff eligible teams in terms of points for while The Spicy Boys held the group’s least points against. TVB comes into the playoffs as the top scorer amongst playoff-eligible teams that past two weeks while The Spicy Boys have finished 3rd in the past two weeks. Let’s breakdown some of the key matchups.
TVB have a pretty soft matchup schedule with Dak going up against Tennessee & a big one to look out for is Amon-Ra against an abysmal Bears’ defense. That being said they did manage to shut down Diggs so that could end up going the other way. The Spicy Boys get some friendly matchups too with Jerrick McKinnon going up against a Broncos team that got absolutely gashed on Christmas day by Cam Akers and the resurgent Evan Engram playing against a pretty terrible Houston team. TVB have the star power in this matchup but The Spicy Boys have been able to get some serious production from their lesser-known names. I’m intrigued to see if they stick with Tom Brady & the double Bucs RB look again this week.
TVB boasts (3) Top 10 RBs & (3) Top 15 WRs while The Spicy Boys only have Evan Engram (Top 5 amongst TEs) to show for. Every single player within the current Spicy Boys’ lineup is slated for 1pm on Sunday while TVB has more of a mix with two players going on Thursday and Joe Mixon to cap it off on Monday night.
PICK: While I want to pick the upset and there’s a definitely possibility for it, I just don’t see the star power of TVB falling to the point where they can’t outscore the Spicy Boys.
Bijan Bowl Preview
So, since sleeper can’t show the projections for this game, I had to do the math. I am good at math. At the moment this game is projected to be a TIGHT one with TBB having a +3-point projection over the Trans Cigs. TBB’s big hitters have some tasty matchups with Justin Fields going up against Detroit, Cam Akers going up against the Chargers & CeeDee getting the Titans. However, as of late the under the radar guys have been the difference makers for TBB. Trans Cigs, on the other hand, have some tough matchups but Monday night could end up being a high scoring game which would be a huge boost to the Cigs and Ja’Marr Chase. TBB‘s lineup will be done after Sunday Night Football while the Trans Cigs get to close the matchup out with Gabe Davis & Chase on Monday Night Football. This is going to be an incredible Bijan Bowl.
PICK: Trans Cigs are going to take this one solely because The Batgirls have struggled to pick the right fringe guys and James Cook will go off for 30 points sitting on the bench.
Well, that concludes this blog. I can’t wait for this weekend to see how it all ends after our first season in the world’s greatest dynasty league. Hope you’ve all enjoyed these. Love you all. HAHAHAHHA fucking Ben you suck, and you’re so fucked.
AverageFantasyFootballGuy.com 