Week 4 is in the books and I’m slowly enjoying this more and more. Do I have a win? No. But the real question is, am I happy? Also no. But I like where my 0-8 team is going. What does bring me joy is two new entrants to the WWFS House. We welcome you with open arms. Just watch the needles. Let’s dive in to a high scoring week.
Cam Musters .00269 Acres As Batgirls Stall Out
Pain. Super tight matchup coming into MNF with Sleeper continuing to completely fuck up Cam Akers projected stats. The Sad Dads needed Aiyuk to just catch a few balls to seal the win and he did just that. It was the classic lowest winner of the week and it is very fitting that the Batgirls were involved. Tough times are ahead though as Javonte’s injury leaves a glaring hole in the Sad Dads lineup while Swift just straight up can’t fuckin stay healthy. Whining from the Sad Dads camp continues to echo around the league regarding IR spots, me not drinking loser beers at 5 am on a Tuesday, etc. To that I say,
Can I interest you in a package of Breece Hall & Michael Carter for 5 first round picks??
Trans Cigs Transition Late To Seal Comeback
TVB’s Governor Pat Shetzline suffered two BRUTAL comebacks this week but luckily this one was a bit more obvious as SNF unfolded. Some would argue he suffered a third comeback as he unfortunately woke up this morning. Heading into SNF, the TCs were done by almost 40 and projected to lose by 9. However the resurgence of CEH and getting Mike Evans back into the lineup proved to be too much as the two players combined for a whopping 57 points. The TCs continue to perform despite their murky QB situation and Kyle Pitts’ struggles. A dud from Dalton Schultz and top wideout ArSb being out contributed to TVB’s inability to grab the win. I think they’ll be okay going forward but the TCs are proving to be a force in the SL.
NIM Lay A Large Hammer On The Funkles
Shit pumping. Absolute shit pumping. Not to mention the NIM left some points on the bench after Jacobs and Penny fucking snapped. The NIM have internally been pretty down on their squad but things are starting to look up for them. And with DHop coming back I can see them being a playoff caliber team. It was a tough week for the Funkles though. Their insane run was bound to end soon and boy did it come crashing down with the low score of the week. The Trevor Lawrence coming out party got completely busted. Lack of RB production caught up with them (they’re really bad) and Jaylen Waddle seems to be coming back down to earth a bit. I would sell him. Now. To me.
Free Deshaun Commits Another Assault
It’s time to start respecting the preseason # 10 but I must say every time I look at his lineup I just simply don’t get it. Guys doing well with what he has though you gotta respect it. Even after a fine worthy start of Michael Thomas, Free Deshaun got out to a resounding lead and one that even great performances from Deebo & Higbee couldn’t cut down on. PSKs are on a slight skid and their newly acquired pieces haven’t exactly helped the cause. 3 straight H2H losses is a tough situation but in all fairness two of the three were against high powered offenses. I can’t wait for the downfall of Free Deshaun if I’m being honest.
CTB Chokes Another Team, As Free Deshaun Watches Intently
Simply put, CTB are a fucking wagon. Lou is on my shit list because he’s so MIA and I could literally write a story talking shit on him and he won’t even know. But, luckily his team is just flat out fucking good. No longer riding the coattails of Lamar, he got some serious production from his RBs and with Pierce continuing to shine plus holding Patterson’s handcuff in Allegeier he shouldn’t have too many issues going forward. CTB is the rare case in this league of getting marginal production from WRs but still playing incredibly well. Spicy Boys on the other hand get a much needed median win to help end their skid. Their depth is just so bad I find it difficult to see them making the playoffs but they seem like much better guys than the other pieces of shit in this league. I like them. Good and spicy guys.
Week 4 Picks: 2-3
Record to Date: 11-12
Post Week 4 Power Rankings as of 10.4.22
- Free Deshaun (6-2) ↑1
- Choking the Belichicken (6-2) ↑2
- The Funky Uncles (5-3) ↓2
- The Violent Beauregardes (4-4) ↓1
- Transgender Cigs (6-2) ↑1
- Portuguese Short Kings (3-5) ↓1
- 9 Inch Males (4-4) ↔
- The Spicy Boys (3-5) ↔
- Sad Dads (3-5) ↔
Unranked but Frisky (Receiving 1 vote): The Bitchin’ Batgirls (0-8)
Week 5 Quick Picks
Sad Dads vs. Spicy Boys – Sad Dads are decimated with injuries, Spicy Boys roll
TBB vs. Trans Cigs – Close again but no cigar, Cigs win
TVB vs. PSKs – Probably one of the tighter matchups. Gordon could help but he’s a fumble machine. I suspect ArSb plays so I see a TVB win
Free Deshaun vs. NIM – NIM are quietly climbing up. Good depth. I like them in another upset
GAME OF THE WEEK: CTB vs. The Funkles
Funkles are entering a dangerous territory. I wouldn’t be shocked to see them aggressively move for a RB soon. This is a much closer matchup than the projections are showing but I think CTB continues its’ dominant reign.
Well that concludes another glorious week of football. Only 13 more weeks to go before we crown our inaugural champion. Lots left to play for and pay for (fines). I will list the outstanding fines next week.
Signing off (and like I genuinely may like my team’s direction), your beloved commissioner.
AverageFantasyFootballGuy.com 